Link

Bored People Quit

https://medium.com/keep-learning-keep-growing/bored-people-quit-7354792e0e6e#.hnktf8n7s

So good. Not just for managers. These are great questions for anyone to ask oneself:

  • Are you bored?
  • Do you know why?
  • Can it be shifted?

A cautionary tale:

Boredom was a seed. What was “I’m bored” grew roots and became “I’m bored and why isn’t anyone doing anything about it?” and sprouted “I’m bored, I told my boss, and he… did nothing,” and finally bloomed into “I don’t want to work at a place where they don’t care if I’m bored.”

The article gives great specifics on how to uncover and combat boredom and what boredom represents: lack of belief in the team.

Practice: Showing Up

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Lately, I’ve been noticing times when something’s really bugging me but I don’t speak up. Why don’t I say something? A few reasons:

  • Don’t want to start a conflict
  • Can’t figure out a “nice” way to say it
  • Maybe it isn’t my place
  • Don’t believe my speaking up will change anything, and therefore it’s not worth the effort

My DH offered that speaking up can simply be good practice. My reactions to that were “true” and “meh.” Poor guy, why am I dismissive of good practice? I’ll come back to that.

Good practice or not, I became aware of my attachment to a certain outcome. Maybe saying something is good practice. But when I say something and nothing the thing that I wanted doesn’t happen, I get frustrated. My “why bother?” feelings kick in. And they stop me from trying again. This felt like an important realization! What if I could say something and let go of my attachment to a particular outcome? 

That was as far as the exercise went until I saw Justine Musk‘s tweet today.

Argument doesn’t change people (good stories change people) but it helps you deepen + refine your own understanding of what you stand for.

DING went the light bulb! Her words address two areas of my struggle:

  • Changing others
  • Clarity of self expression

My story about speaking up is that “we can’t change other people. So it’s not my place / not worth it / why bother.” But people do change, sometimes nudged by outside influences. I can see how stories are way more effective than complaining.

Justine’s tweet also helps me in the “let go of my attachment” department. Speaking up is not about changing someone’s mind or winning an argument. It’s about getting clear about my own thinking and being able to express it. I do have feelings about some topics of our day (Uber-style businesses, the digital divide, income inequality) but rarely say anything. The times that I’ve tried to recently, I quickly get tongue tied and stall out. Maybe there’s something to this practice thing after all.

 

Somewhere After The Rainbow (Moving Beyond Profile Pics)

After the events of the past week in the US – the marriage equality ruling and the Charleston hate crime – I have been wondering what can *I* personally do to help effect positive change. This is new territory for me. I’m grateful for Pastor John Pavlovitz’s suggestion:

“Laws and amendments and judicial rulings can change policy, but only relationships can alter people. I’m inviting those with rainbow profile photos (and those who echo their sentiments) to engage those of differing opinions, who are willing to have a conversation; not a public, passive-aggressive volleying of Scripture quotes and personal jabs and article shares, but an honest, open, fully vulnerable exchange.

That’s the only way we move forward from here, the only way we can fashion something deeper and more lasting and more worthy of co-owning.”

john pavlovitz

Rainbow Heart

The Supreme Court’s ruling on Marriage finally came down last week—and both Hell and Heaven broke loose, depending on your perspective.

Exhilaration soon followed for those seeing this as a long overdue victory for civil marital equality, while outrage reigned for religious folks believing it to be the final nail in the coffin of Biblical Matrimony.

And there was of course, a flurry of sentiments from both sides on social media; effusive celebration and grief-laden hand wringing flying in as fast as your browser could refresh.

Yet nothing in all of those eloquent words from either side, spoke as clearly and loudly as the brilliant prismatic display of love and affirmation found in the rainbow profile photos now dominating timelines worldwide. That’s been the most visible, most revelatory element of the past week, with over 26 million people already choosing to “Amen” the Supreme Court’s decision using their own images.

Perhaps the most telling aspect, is that these multicolored flags haven’t just been flown by the LGBT…

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Priorities

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“I am often struck by the fact that the modern world is full of affected knowledge & information that, when you get right down to it, is only relevant to the extent we grant it relevance. We have become very good at procuring & prioritizing things that are not fundamentally all that important – cars and computers and cell phones come to mind – even as we have become less good at providing for ourselves the things that are downright essential: Food. Shelter. Water. Warmth.” -Ben Hewitt

This quote speaks to my Luddite heart.
Seen via Falan Storm on Instagram.

"I am often struck by the fact that the modern world is full of affected knowledge & information that, when you get right down to it, is only relevant to the extent we grant it relevance. We have become very good at procuring & prioritizing things that are not fundamentally all that important – cars and computers and cell phones come to mind – even as we have become less good at providing for ourselves the things that are downright essential: Food. Shelter. Water. Warmth." -Ben Hewitt 🌲I spent a long time resisting buying a home – for many reasons…rooting my wild spirit, committing to a home & mortgage, and the downright logistics of what we wanted to make ours. But somewhere in me I wanted roots too. I wanted a humble home surrounded by plenty of wild space to allow for those essentials: food, shelter, water, warmth (and mostly to hold the story of our family's love). Buying this home last Fall has been one of the most surprising priorities I've taken on. Sometimes I bitch a bit because our weekends of hiking have been replaced with projects & homesteading in the making; however, I am tremendously grateful to walk this wee bit of acreage & this tiny home and see the results of a labor of love whose roots have already grounded deep. This picture is from weeks ago. Those beds began last fall when I lasagna layered them with fallen leaves, our city compost, chicken poo bedding & more. Next came the fence to deter both the domestic & wild animals. Today, I can walk our land and see the beginnings of something that truly matters. Something fundamentally important. I see persimmon trees, a fig tree, an apple tree, wild strawberries, wild blackberries, planted blueberry/strawberry/grape/strawberry plants, nasturiums, wild edibles, cut flowers, and a garden of planted potatoes, cukes, pickling cukes, zucchini, squash, corn, brussels sprouts, kale, lettuce, spinach, cherry tomatoes, slicing/canning tomatoes, bell peppers, green beans, peas & more. 🌽🏡🍓 #fromwhereibloom #gratefulgrateful #home #backyardgarden #justthebeginning #beginninggarden #backyardgardening #homesteading

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Running across the Golden Gate Bridge

I Don’t Like Running. So Why the Heck Do I Do It?

Running across the Golden Gate Bridge

Mermaid Sirena 10 mile run, November 2014

Some people love running. LOOOVE it. The endorphin kick, the runner’s high, feeling fleet and strong and free. These people look forward to running, have running shoes in the car just in case, and get disappointed when they can’t go for a run.

I am not one of these people. For me, running is <grunt>. Aack. Bleah. Oof. Running is a hard slog.

My Facebook timeline seems to tell a different story. Training runs. Event sign-ups. Running selfies. Victorious finish-line photos. Between what I post about running vs. how I feel about running, there’s a big disconnect. How can I train for and participate in all these running events if I really don’t like running?

“Are you sure you don’t like running?” my friends ask. “How can that be? There must be something you like about it.”

“Um…… <thinking> Not really.” I was stumped myself. How can this be? Why do I keep doing it? I’ve asked myself this question off and on for several years.

This week, as I was proudly showing my newly-earned Hot Chocolate 15k hoodie, I was again asked, “Are you sure you don’t like running?” And I gave a new answer.

“Maybe I like running more than I thought.”

Huh. That was different! All this time, I’ve been very conscious of what I don’t like about running. Running is hard. I get out of breath. Things hurt. I get blisters. If I don’t drink enough water the day before, man – I feel parched during a run. My digestion can get jostled around. No wonder I don’t like running! No wonder I don’t look forward to it.

But with this new thought, I asked myself again, “Why do I do it? What do I like about running?”

Here’s what I realized. I run because:

  • It’s good for me. OK, that’s not a new realization. I’ve always had this as a reason, but it felt like a “should”. But should or not, it’s a healthy activity. I don’t do much exercise otherwise. If I run properly with good form, I can do it and not get injured.
  • It causes me to be intensely present with myself and my body. I’m constantly monitoring how I’m doing. Out of breath? Slow down. Something hurts? Shift. It’s absolutely hateful? Run for at least one mile (and then I can stop if I want). Being highly aware of my body and adjusting to take care of it seems like a really great practice.
  • I actually do enjoy noticing improvement. We all have different measurements and definitions for improvement. I just needed to let go of fear of judgment and defensiveness around definitions that are different from mine.

Among my running friends, I’m known for being strongly opposed to running a marathon or achieving a certain speed. I almost never say “I want to beat my time from last year.” But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to get better. Of course I care about my pace. I feel pride and embarrassment just like anyone. But my running goals are not a marathon or a PR. My running goals are: enjoy myself and don’t get injured. In terms of how my body’s doing, these goals are measured by: the run felt easy, I felt good and strong, and I didn’t get hurt. There are runs where I meet these goals! And that achievement feels so good!

  • It’s fun to run in an organized event! I love that traffic is blocked off, or you get to run in a beautiful nature setting, and someone else has laid out the course. The energy of so many other runners around feels like a supportive embrace. It’s especially fun to sign up with friends, to give encouragement at the start and cheers at the end. And sometimes there’s really good event swag.

Earlier this week, my dear husband said to me, “You do the running. But when you talk about running, it feels like you don’t have yourself. What reasons do you have for running that are just for you?” I loved that question. And I love that I’m finally seeing some answers about myself.

Don’t worry. I still don’t love running. I’m still grouchy, fussy me. But maybe I really do like running more than I thought. This post is for the others of you out there who don’t love running, and who do it anyway. Fast or slow, enthusiastic or not – if you run, you are a runner. Rock on, fellow athletes!

Good Things Come To Those Who Tweet

Winner

I was sitting in the kitchen reading my phone and I blurted out to my dear husband, “Omigosh, I won an iPad Mini!” He skeptically said, “Uh….. I don’t think so.” I don’t blame him for being wary, with so much spam, phishing, and other unpleasantness that can show up in our inboxes and social streams these days.

But in this case, I really did win, it is real! I’m happy and honored to be recognized as one of the top tweeters from the JiveWorld14 conference

The best part is, winning was totally unexpected. I wasn’t playing to win. I was just doing what I love to do:

  • Attend a top-notch social business conference, packed with some of the smartest, most experienced, and passionate people on the planet
  • Share the goodness by tweeting out as many gems and insights as my smartphone keyboard and 4G data plan could handle

Have you ever live-tweeted a conference or cool event that you’ve attended? It’s quite a rush and has lasting effects. I love doing it because:

  • Note-taking: My online sharing has become my notebook. Instead of writing notes for myself, I post them online and can always refer back to them (and it’s easier to read than my atrocious handwriting)
  • Sharing: Others can see what I post. Maybe the information will be helpful for someone else!
  • Networking: I meet people this way. Speakers who I have tweeted, or people who reply, share, or ask questions about what I posted – these are connection touchpoints. I probably would not have a reason or chance to meet these folks otherwise
  • Learning: When other people share, I get to read their goodness and meet them

For me, online sharing is its own reward. Putting my thoughts or observations out there, sparking ideas and possibly helping others – known or unknown to me – feels so satisfying. To be recognized and win a prize for an activity I already love to do – what a sweet surprise and icing on the cake! Thank you for the gift, Jive Software! And congratulations to all the JiveWorld14 Game Series winners.

Good things really do come when you share online. What goodness have you brought your way lately?